If relationship is like a body, trust is the blood.
The Russians have a saying about trust:
“Trust in God. Everyone else, mind your own f***ing business.”
Ah. Advice from a Russian is like their vodka.
Crystal clear liquid fire.
Trust is a funny thing. Not “haha” funny but funny like “if we don’t chuckle and pretend we understand this mystery it will suck the life and light right out of our hearts ’cause every heart that gives up and goes into the Anti-trust Black Hole of Self Preservation is never seen or felt from again.”
I don’t have much to say about trust. I don’t know much.
Other folks have a lot to say, though. Like psychologists. And God.
Psychologists says “trust is like the chicken or the egg thing.” You need trust to be vulnerable and you need to be vulnerable to build trust. Oh, super helpful. Thanks science. So relationship is ruled by Quid Pro Quo. I hope you like pitch black water slides that go who knows where.
But hang on… before we headlong into slippery tit-for-tat…
Aren’t there some people who didn’t wait for a “safe place” to make vulnerable their hearts? And don’t we admire, idolize and sometimes worship those people?
Joan of Arc, Martin Luther, and the King Jr., the famous Ghandi and also Indira Ghandi, Lincoln…
Oh. I see. All these folks were killed all day long.
Living your life all out for the all in is a good way to lose it.
I guess that’s why he said “Father forgive them, they don’t know…”. He was all about losing the life to gain The Life.
So then someone has to go first. And keep going first. And keep going first. No matter what.
Maybe we aren’t supposed to find a “safe place” to give ourselves in weakness.
Maybe we were made for higher things. For death. For Life.
Maybe a higher hope is made for us, a hope that lets us take their spear in our softest parts and say “Father forgive them.”
Maybe trust is measured by forgiveness.
Maybe as you measure, so will it be measured to you.
Maybe that’s crazy talk.
A mystery.
How is that YHWH loves Israel and my heart through 1,817 betrayals? Through the 1,817 times I’ve laid down with Pride, Self-Pity, Fear, Self-Reliance? Father forgive me.
How is that Jesus loves us through it all?
Persecution and murder from his enemies: loved them, noble hero stuff. Betrayed by his Beloved? Hold on. Loved them? Yep. Doesn’t even bring it up.
I don’t have any explanation for Trust like that. It shouldn’t exist. But it does.
Where Forgiveness is, Trust, there is something Precious, something Sacred, something Divine. Father forgive me. I want that Holy Ground in me. I want to start going barefoot around my heart.
I think the Russians got it right, mostly.
Flesh will fail.
Trust in God.
P.S. I’ll be out back for a bit. It’s time to shoot the dog – Quid Pro Quo and his long record of wrongs. He’s got to go. Bullet in the head. Quick and quiet. Burn ‘im with fire. Salt the ashes. Toss ’em in deep water. I’ll be back before supper.
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Jeremiah 17:5. Psalm 44:22. Luke 23:34. Matthew 10:37. John 16:33. Luke 6:37. Hosea 4:12. Hosea 4:15. Hosea 9:1. Psalm 118:8. 2 Timothy 2:11. Psalm 23:6.
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